Quote

"You have to learn to select your thoughts the same way you select your clothes everyday. Now that's a power you can cultivate. You want to come here and you want to control your life so bad, work on the mind- that's the only thing you should be trying to control. Cause if you can't master your thoughts, you're in trouble forever. Stop trying, surrender". - Elizabeth Gilbert

Another quote from Elizabeth Gilbert's memoir, EAT PRAY LOVE. I read her memoir some time ago, and while this quote did stand out to me in some way when I first read it, it wasn't as powerful as it was when I came back to it 4 or 5 months ago. Every week, for about 3 months, I did a daily chart that consisted of a column for my feelings, a column for an irrational thought, and a column for a challenge to that thought. The person who reviewed these charts with me is an adamant believer in the idea that everyone has choices and that we all have the power to choose how we perceive ourselves, others, and the situations we encounter. As time went by, I began to recognize that I had become a firm believer in this idea as well.

I remember having a conversation with a friend who was thinking in her emotion-mind. When I tried to assist her in counter-acting her negative thoughts, she said something along the lines of while those all may be nice, positive thoughts, what if they aren't the truth? I had to sit back for a moment because at one point, I wondered the same thing. A person can tell themselves a lot of positive things and that doesn't make it a fact. I think what it comes down to is, what is going to be beneficial for the person? From my experience, putting myself down, catastrophizing, and focusing on everything "wrong", only worsened the situation for me. I find that positive self-talk has been much more effective in aiding me in handling problems skillfully.

Also, I gained a sense of mastery in choosing how I was going to think. For so long, I felt my thoughts, my feelings, and basically everything about and around me, was out of control. Understanding that I can't control others or my environment and that I can control how I perceive those things was beyond beneficial to me. Now, when I find myself thinking solely with my emotion-mind, I am able to conquer the negativity by reminding myself that I am in control of how I choose to think. I can't change what happens around me. I can, however, change what occurs within me.